Leprechaun 4:

In Space

What is there to say about this movie? There's a Leprechaun (Warwick Davis) and it's in space. Well, there's more to the story, but not much. For some reason that is not discussed in the movie, the Leprechaun is in space and has kidnapped the beautiful Princess Zarina (Rebekah Carlton) and has successfully wooed her with a ton of gold. The master plan is to, as he so elegantly puts it: "wed her, bed her and bury her all in one night". Anyway that plan failed when a bunch of soldiers and a doctor shows up for probably the same unknown reason why Leppy is in space. Ignoring all that, the soldiers attack and he is 'killed' and the princess is wounded and unconscious.  One of the soldiers, decides to pee on one of the Leprechaun's legs and gets a shock. Later when he and Private Delores Costello (Debbe Dunning) are about to have sex, the fully grown Leprechaun pops out of the dude's pants, killing him in the process. Damn, what a way to go. I think it was Kowalski (Geoff Meed) who died, but I can't be a hundred percent sure. It's not that important anyway. Dr Tina Reeves (Jessica Collins) and Sgt. Brook Malloy (Brent Jasmer) are the only two important ones, because there's a sexual tension between the two, or there would be if either of them had any acting ability. Anyway because of this 'tension' they are going to be the only two that live. I spent the rest of the movie guessing at the order of deaths of the other characters. I was mostly right too.

Anyway, back to the film. Leppy has demanded that they release his girlfriend and he'll let them live. Dr. Mittenhand (Guy Siner) flat out refuses because Zarina's DNA has a regenerative quality that he desperately wants considering that he is a head and an arm and that's about it. So since he is in charge of the badly designed and terribly CGI'd space ship (I have no idea why he's in charge; maybe it's his ship or something) he orders the soldiers to find and kill Leppy. Because that worked to well the first time. The soldiers start dying, no surprise, but there are very interesting ways of death, involving flesh eating fog, large crates, falling off catwalks and even a cross dressing marine... yeah. Anyway, during the dying, the princess wakes up and she and Leppy cause even more havoc when they turn Dr. Mittenhand into a mutant spider/scorpion thingy, that to my knowledge has only one purpose in the entire movie and that it to rip of Tina's red, skin tight pants, because apparently they weren't skin tight enough for it's liking.

After they reunite the dastardly duo make there way to the cargo hold to find his gold, which about when Zarina decided to kill Leppy and take his gold, after she kills her father to become queen that is. What happens after that? The most important thing is that Malloy losses his shirt. The rest is not important to the story since the camera is always focused on him. Leppy gets blown into space eventually and that's the end of it.  Hey! The black dude lived! Sticks (Miguel A. Nunez Jr.) is still alive. I didn't see that one coming.

I think the consumption of alcohol is greatly needed to make this movie remotely enjoyable. If you can't find enough (trust me you'll need a lot) then just find a group of friends that can make fun of anything. Or both.

Grade: 2/10