D-War: Dragon Wars

 

*Deep breath* Okay here goes nothing.

Reporter Ethan Kendrick (Jason Behr) is at a scene of an incident where a giant scale type thing has been discovered and that makes his mind wander back to when he was a child and in Jack's Antique shop and stumbled on a box containing identical scales. The owner, Jack (Robert Forster) tells little Ethan (Cody Arens) a Korean Legend. There are these creatures called Imoogi that aren't dragons but every 500 years the heavens send down this power to Earth and if an Imoogi combines with this power they can become dragons and joins actual dragons up in the heavens. This power, called the Yuh-Yi-Joo, is born into a girl and when she turns twenty the power develops and then the Imoogi can consume it and become a dragon. Five hundred years ago in Korea the power was born in Narin (Hyojin Ban) and Haram (Hyun Jin) was trained to protect her and they fell in love. Just before she turned twenty an evil Imoogi, called Buraki rose up and raised an army of soldiers made of metal, weird creature with rocket launchers on their backs (Dwadlers), smaller dragons (Bulcos) and velociraptor-type creatures (Shaconnes) and are nearly successful in capturing her, but Haram gets her away, but instead of giving her over to the good Imoogi they kill themselves and are reborn into this world 500 years later. Ethan is Haram and Narin is a girl called Sarah (Amada Brooks). Now faced with his destiny Ethan must track down Sarah.

Sarah, on the other hand is starting to act crazy and after some kind of panic attack where her birthmark/tattoo/mark of the Yuh-Yi-Joo starts to burn and she is brought to the hospital where they lock her up in quarantine because they think she is crazy. Ethan somehow -  I have yet to determine how - tracks her down and explains to her what is happening. While this is going on, Buraki is destroying bits of the city looking for her and his army is starting to get reanimated. The FBI get involved and somehow come to the conclusion that Sarah is responsible for the creature's wanton destruction and they want her dead. I am at a loss to explained the reasoning behind that. Seriously, I don't even know how they know what they know. Do they have a division in the burrow that investigates legends and myths that might pop up in day to day life?

Anyway Ethan and Sarah, get away and fall in love and I am only willing to believe that because of their past lives and that their souls recognize each other. If that hadn't been there then that would've been completely unbelievable, it almost was completely unbelievable considering there is no chemistry between the two of them.  Jack helps them, but I don't know why he doesn't help them as Jack but he shapeshifts into other forms. That makes no sense to me. Continuing one they army and the US military have met up and are fighting each other in the only scene that made this movie at all enjoyable to watch.

The Bulcos catch up, finally, to Ethan and Sarah on her twentieth birthday (which is like two days after this movie started) and bring them........somewhere. It's some kind of fortress I have no idea where it is, I have no idea why the bad guy's army brought them there and why they just didn't bring Sarah to Buraki, and I have no idea why they brought Ethan, because he finally does something useful and defeats the army and frees Sarah. Buraki is still left however but that is when the good Imoogi catches up to them and attacks Buraki but is defeated. Only then does Ethan try to get them away but Sarah is done with running and gives her power to the good Imoogi and he turns into a Celestial Dragon and defeats Buraki. Oh and Sarah is dead, and Ethan is trapped is some weird dimension or something.

This movie made no sense to me whatsoever. During Jack's story I got lost three times. Even when we actually get into the plot of the movie, it is so simplistic that it doesn't make any sense. Ethan is searching trough a database of all the Sarah's in LA and miraculously finds the one he's looking for? I don't think so. The only enjoyable scene is the battle scene at the end. That's it. The rest of it is stupid, choppy, terribly acted, and filled with cliché 'fate' and 'destiny' babble.

I knew going into this movie that it was going to be bad and even then I was shocked at how bad it actually was.

Grade: 1/10